January 25, 2015
I have put the “No Contact” rule in place. That means, have cut off all communications with John the NarcSo (Narcissistic Sociopath). I blocked his phone number from being able to communicate with me by phone and text. I asked him to stop emailing me. He continued to email me so I called the Sheriff’s office and had a Deputy visit him and tell him to stop emailing me. Any further communications from him will result in him being cited for violating the Order of Protection. He had blocked me from his Facebook account nearly a year ago; however, he still has access to read mine through mutual friends. I have removed some mutual friends from my Facebook and blocked them. Out of sight, out of mind. I no longer have access to see what he writes on his Facebook nor have I been trying to find out. This is a new year. It is time to focus on healing. I will not allow him to continue to serve as a distraction to me and pull me off of my path. I have a purpose. I will fulfill my purpose and I will not allow anything to get in my way.
My purpose is to use my experiences and my pain to help others in their times of need. If somebody is sad, my purpose is to find her smile, even if just for a brief moment. If somebody is lost, my purpose is to help him find his way back to his path with a compliment, a few words of encouragement, a touch of hope and a little bit of love to enable him to build the confidence within himself to get back up followed by a gentle nudge towards the little light flickering on his path to all that’s right and just, the path that leads him out of the darkness and into the light, the path to the place where he is protected from the monsters of the dark, the place where his faith dwells and where God is waiting to meet him, to turn his pain into comfort, his sorrow into joy and reward him with treasures beyond what any mere mortal could ever dream of. There, in the light at the end of his path, he will be Saved by God’s Grace and he will forever be changed. God will give him his purpose and he will go out to fulfill it.
I write at WordPress.com and Jigsy.com. I currently have three blogs on WordPress for separate issues. I have decided not to close this Jigsy account. I am going to incorporate all three blogs here onto my Jugsy website on their own separate pages so that I may have all of my work and extras in one place. Since the “No Contact Rule” has been put into place, I find that I have more time to write and work towards fulfilling my purpose. It will take a little time to consolidate and organize everything. My three WordPress blogs and their purposes are:
No More Silence
Starting out as a mirror for No More Silence on Jigsy, No More Silence is beginning to expand outside of my personal experiences to include the experiences of others, my thoughts, opinions, and ideas surrounding various types of abuses and outside articles related to abusive situations, abusers, and other related content.
Dispelling Rumors
This is my latest site. I was filling up my Facebook with the lies my ex NarcSo has told about me on his “Smear Campaign” and the information disproving his lies, but I wanted it to be more pubic, and on my Facebook, I cannot have it public because my children and other children are on my Facebook and they do not need to witness the nastiness that he has been carrying out. I need to address everything he has said, not for others to see what he is, but for myself, for validation and for closure. It will also help those going through similar situations to be aware of how far the Monster is willing to go to prevent himself from being unmasked. They will do whatever it takes to silence the survivors regardless of who gets hurt along the way and regardless of the law and basic human morality. “Dispelling Rumors” sounded like the perfect name for a place to talk about the “Smear Campaign” John has launched against me and everything he is doing to keep me from exposing his true self.
My Little Corner of the WWW
This is the first blog I created some years ago. I didn’t write much at that time. I had so many other things going on, in life and in my head. This is My Place, My Home, My Mind. This is where I what anything and everything I feel like writing when I feel like writing that isn’t specific to Breaking the Silence or Dispelling Rumors. It is where I re blog things I’ve read and liked, share websites I learned from or enjoyed reading, and tell stories about my life, my childhood and other issues I have dealt with. In other words, this is where I write about the things I am thinking about at the time I start writing. I have found that it helps me keep my head clear. Instead of hundreds of little thoughts and memories floating around in my mind, scrambled and cluttered with things I do not need to or care to remember, I write down everything I want to remember about something and discard the leftovers resulting in a clear mind which enables me to focus on important, current matters and issues.
Feel free to drop by any site, take a look around, read what interests you, leave comments or suggestions you may have and I hope that you take something away from you’ve read on my sites that can help you accomplish something in your life or fulfill a need you may have.
I read on “Uncommon Graces”, another WordPress site, the following:
You know what I love most about those words? They put my own thoughts and ideas into words that are so simple to understand, yet so strong they leave an imprint in your heart. I do the best that I can do each and every day to spread love, show my children they are loved and they matter, and to let others know they are important to somebody, somewhere, and not only can they make a difference in the lives of others, but that they do make a difference. Grace believes the Love Changes People. I agree with Grace.
Every morning, at no specific time, I send a text message to my Brian, complimenting him. I tell him different things on different days ad at different times. I do this so that he knows I am thinking of him and I appreciate him. I tell him things like “You are amazing”, “Let’s play hookie and cuddle all day”, “I hope you have a fabulous day!”, “Thank you”, “Wanna get naked?” etc. He then asks, “What was that for?”, “Why? What’d I do?”, or something similar. I reply with “Did you smile?”, “Just for being you”, or “Because you’re you”. I like to make him smile. I’m sure you can relate.
Have you ever had one of those days where everything is going wrong and you just want it to end? Have you ever had somebody out of the blue take interest in how you are really doing, bring you a coffee or a snack without you asking, tell you how nice you look, or compliment you on your work? Did you smile and think to yourself, “That was completely unexpected. Maybe not all of humanity is lost, after all.”? Did you thank the person and tell him or her that he or she just made your day? “Thank you so much. I’ve been having such a terrible day and you just brightened things up a bit for me. I needed that.” Do you often think to yourself that those people are a rare breed? That’s because they are. Are you that tye of person or do you wait until you see somebody in tears or asking for help to speak out? Think about it. Here is something else to think about that I will leave you with for today. What if the first task of the day on everyone’s “Things To Do Today” list was to make somebody smile? What if we all took one simple measure to tell somebody we haven’t told in a while or a complete stranger we pass by, I love you”, say “Hello” with a smile, say “You matter”, show love, wish a fabulous day to, hug, or compliment without any other reason than to let the person know you see him or her? Can you do that?
Make it a 30-day challenge for yourself. Keep a diary and write down who it was, where you saw them, what you did, how they reacted and how it made you feel.
Email me your results to melliving @ icloud.com. Use “Make somebody smile” in the subject line. I’d love to write an article based on such results. #LoveChangesPeople Help Compassion go Viral. Tweet your daily results and use that hashtag. Grace would love it!
Mel, Saved by God’s Grace
No More Silence 